

War's weapon of choice is now sarcasm.
Famine’s idea of scarcity is a waitlist at Erewhon.
Their apocalypse calendar has just one entry: “Someday.”
The Four Horsemen now do TikToks titled #Doomcore Aesthetic.
Famine is on sabbatical to “study scarcity in artisanal cheese.”
Famine’s new favorite phrase: “I don’t do carbs or collapse.”
Death got distracted writing a screenplay called “Soul Catcher.”
Famine claimed gluten intolerance and ghosted the famine queue.
The Horsemen missed a scheduled rapture due to “low turnout.”
Pretty sure Pestilence just opened an aromatherapy spa in Sedona.