

Shark at Myrtle Beach bit out of protest against inflatable flamingos.
Cape Cod shark is now in open relationship with local sea lion.
Bondi Beach shark posed for selfies post-bite.
Shark at Santa Cruz nibbled a vegan. Instantly developed gluten intolerance.
At Pismo Beach, bite victim was mansplaining marine biology.
Laguna Beach shark asked for consent, then still bit.
Long Beach shark became disoriented after biting into a foam noodle.
Daytona Beach sharks reportedly holding out for union benefits.
At Waikiki, shark said it was offended by the man's pineapple pizza tattoo.
Bondi Beach sharks now charge a “flavor tax.”
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